Everyone thinks their child is special and different. In some kind of way, they’re all right. I have this belief we’re all the best in the world at something. Well, Cydney has had an interesting two years in this world and those 37 weeks while she was being carried as well.
While I do not really use much of my psychology degree in a professional manner, I look at behavioral patterns people have and analyze the hell out of it. I know how much your beginning molds you into who you are.
Cydney is a ham. She loves attention, is outgoing, and will draw eyes of whoever she wants attention from. She is also very fond of girls my age. She seeks that out the most. When we were in Buffalo a few weeks ago, I noticed something. Timile’s family threw a birthday party for her, lots of her cousins were there who are about her age. They all went downstairs to play. Cydney loves to play with kids, but she was content being upstairs with the adults playing with toys by herself. While she is an only child and that is typical behavior, she isn’t raised as one because my nephew lives with us. This was interesting behavior and different from the pattern she normally displays.
I was telling a friend of mine about it the next day. He said it was interesting. He pointed out in his time around Cydney that she’s resilient. He pointed out to me to look at her circumstances. She’s moved around a lot and travels a lot. Because of that she finds a way to be content wherever she is. Hmm. I guess he’s right. I think that’s a good trait to have. People like that tend to do well adjusting in adverse situations.
Every parent wonders what will their child be like growing up. I’m no different. I look at the things I think are good habits and try to foster them and the others discourage to them. Because of her circumstances I know not having her mother can and probably will cause some kind of complexes. Hopefully they won’t be bad and I (and those around) can change that from being potentially negative (seeking the wrong kind of attention) into Cydney just being different.
Cydney is beautiful and and was manifested from the best parts of you and Timile. I was the same way… my dad spoke with me about some of his concerns with me growing up… people kept suggesting to him that I have therapy at 3/4 years of age… that not having a mother would cause issues…
The truth is… when you’re that age, everything makes sense to you… you don’t sit around thinking about what you don’t have… the only time it’s a challenge is when we become old enough to discuss and compare… I never thought any differently about life until other kids would talk about their mom’s… and I realized I didn’t have one… I still didn’t even know how to ask the question… I just rationalized it… I also had love and support from women in church and my dad’s friends who would care for me…
There were hard times growing up… but they didn’t hit until I was about 8/9… that’s when you start thinking about those things I feel… you start to wonder what life would be like with a mother… you see your friend’s mothers be nice to them and hold them… and you want it and don’t know why you don’t have it… kids just want love… and you’ll probably talk with her about Timile… I didn’t have any comfort of my father loving my mother… I was adopted… he had nothing nice to say about her… I had no idea who this part of me was…
Cydney has a beautiful dad who loves her completely and loves her mother… she will feel that… and when she has questions, you’ll have answers… and love… and hugs… You’re doing a great job Chad… I know she will turn out amazing, just like you and Timile ❤
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