I know everyone may not agree with this way of discipline…but I do.
Cydney and I have been working on potty training now since August of 2012. Yes, a whole eighteen months. Cydney knows when to go but opts to do whatever else she wants to do instead until it’s too late. Tuesday afternoon I walked into the room where Cydney was playing and I smelled the odor. I asked “Cydney, did you make stinky?” She said “No.”
I touched her underwear and felt the clump inside her overnight pull up and told her I could feel that she did. I asked her “Cydney did you not tell the truth to me?” She put her finger to her temple in contemplation and said “Ummmmm yes.” I was actually amused because she successfully took a tense moment and made it humorous but as a parent I had to mask my laughter and do something about it.
I changed her and got her dressed. As soon as I did I popped her on her backside a good four or five times. She started to cry. I told her why I did it and she said “It was an accident.” I said “It wasn’t the accident, it was that you lied to me and didn’t tell the truth.” In tears she said that she was sorry but quickly got over it because I really came upstairs to pull out her snowsuit to go outside and play in the snow. It was over.
For those who think that this is archaic the whole point of using this form of discipline is not to hurt the child physically. I didn’t hurt Cydney at all. It was about sending a message and by transitive property hurt their feelings. I let Cydney know that her lying to me hurt my feelings more than anything else. I believe that full out spankings are the last resorts for large infractions or many misdemeanor offenses that lead to corporal punishment. Do I like hurting my child’s feelings? No. But I don’t care what anyone says nothing puts fear in a child and will convince them to do the right thing more than knowing some form of a whooping is the result.
As I’ve said I do consider myself a religious person and follow the bible. Just as food for thought for those that do as well look at Proverbs 13:24 which says “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.” Boom. I think it is all the way true. That rod can be a proverbial one as well (see what I did there?) and come in the form of some other kind of discipline, but this is the one I use as the last resort.
I bet at least for this week Cydney will think twice about lying to me.
Dr. James Dobson “Dare to Discipline.” It’s the best book. It talks about how spanking is appropriate (at certain ages) and other methods of discipline are appropriate at other stages in life. For instance, a young child doesn’t truly understand death from a speeding car. However, he does understand if he goes into the street he will get a spanking. When my 2 year old painted poo on his walls and bed for the 3rd time, he got a spanking. Reasoning with him the two other times, didn’t work. He understood spanking, and didn’t do it again. That was necessary because it was a “health issue.” Right about that time, he went through a biting phase. No amount of reasoning and time outs worked…he got kicked out of pre-school. One day, he bit dad really hard in the shoulder, got a big spanking that smarted, and he ceased biting. Again, another health issue. Biting and poo all over are health risks. So, I agree with Dr. James. Now my kids are 8 and 10, spanking doesn’t deter from undesirable behavior. They are at an age they can understand. Now we put ipads on time outs… that kills them and makes them rethink.
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Sounds like a good read. Spanking is almost always the last resort. That sounds like viable reasons for one. I usually got spankings for things like I was sent to the principal’s office (My record is five times in one day. I think I’m gonna write about that soon) and my mom got a phone call about it.
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